As week two begins, I want to thank everyone who messaged us, called us and encouraged us during week one of visiting Birmingham, Alabama! God has blessed us with incredible support over the years and even more amazing friendships! We are excited for multiple reasons to be nearing the end of our visit — first, to be going home in five days, no extra explanation needed — and second, Lincoln is ready to have his cast off! I will be a little sad to leave because we truly love our time in the south! We had an amazing weekend in Atlanta with dear friends who drove from North Carolina to meet us. As always, it was bittersweet to see them go. However, memories were made and I am grateful for the people in my life that can pick up where we left off no matter how much time has passed. When relationships are easy and feel natural, the entire experience is worth every second! This weekend, easy meant sitting on a hotel bed chatting after a long day, while our boys wound down. Sometimes the simple things in life are the most enjoyable! I believe in friendship (Friendship - click here to read my recent post on the subject ) and am so blessed to have strong bonds in my life!
While It was a quick weekend in Atlanta, Lincoln and I were pleasantly surprised to see sunshine and blue sky when we returned to Alabama today! It has been raining, actually pouring, non-stop since we arrived. It only seemed right regardless of being tired that we took advantage of the sun and visited the local zoo! Tonight we are happy to be relaxing in our apartment, content and truly feeling blessed as we prepare for our final days here.
“With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable. ”
When I think about life, I know it can be hard and completely unfair at times! I have experienced hardship firsthand, and I know that we all have unique struggles that color and create our story. That is the beauty of life! We all struggle, but we also all have the opportunity to persevere and shine! If blood runs through your veins, you will at some point in life feel defeated, be defeated or defy. One thing I believe the majority of people have in common though, is the understanding and necessity of perseverance. Somewhere along the way, you have had to dig deep and push on. You have survived! You have succeeded! But where did you learn those life skills? If you were blessed with great role models, you likely learned it from your parents, or sadly, if you were raised in an opposite environement, maybe perseverance was a means of survival. Something I cannot relate to, but deeply respect. Regardless of the how, most of us as adults will take pride in teaching our children the same values. Perseverance is all about working hard despite disappointment or failure. It teaches us to keep trying even if takes days, months or years to succeed.
Perseverance: continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition, steadfastness.
You may wonder what perseverance has to do with Alabama but the two go hand in hand. Everytime I visit Birmingham and perform constraint therapy with Lincoln, I realize how amazing he truly is. Taking away the dominant hand of a child and asking them to perform everyday tasks without it, is a frustrating task. Just for fun, test the method on yourself or your child for a day! Yet, with the tenacity that only a child has at times, he exceeds my every expectation and does what he is asked. His motions do not always look the best, the movements at time are slow and inaccurate, and in true five year old fashion — some requests are met with complete opposition and a meltdown. But for the most part I stand back in awe of not only the human brain to train itself, but the grit my five year old child has. He not only works hard for three hours of therapy everyday while we are in Alabama, plus activities at home — but he does it with a happy attitude and a willingness to keep going back! How many adults do you know that would quit long before two weeks was over? Children are so resilient — hence the reason, over and over again, I advocate for therapy! I see the positive impact it has on their life regardless of how hard it can be as a parent to watch in the moment. Remember, moments pass and you are changing their life! This concept goes far beyond therapy of course. To all my readers who are parents, apply the same concept with school and learning, sports, sharing, playing an instrument, the list goes on and on. Children will continue to persevere and keep trying if encouraged appropriately! I love this about the innocence of a child. As most of us know, failure is inevitable and will happen at some point. It is the skills we teach our children now that will help them navigate those moments as they grow! I am grateful to my own parents for this. I was encouraged to try new things, but I was never allowed to quit. If I did not enjoy or succeed at something, I had to finish the season or task and only then I could move on. I also believed I could do anything because of their love! I feel like this is a dying breed in our society, the ability to dream and believe! Let’s stand behind the old saying, “faith like a child” — because it means something!
“We are what we repeatedly do, excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit. ”
I believe we can all learn from the concept of perseverance, and the lesson it teaches us. No matter who you are, someone will always be smarter, faster, stronger, insert other examples here — and it is important to develop a positive mindset that can push through the struggle and complete the work necessary to succeed! As I discuss the topic, I realized there are amazing stories of people who overcome unimaginable circumstance, but I also believe that this applies to all of us in everyday life. As parents, I encourage you to have frequent discussions with your children about the importance of perseverance and how to react when life may not go their way.
The following are a few concepts I believe can be introduced at a young age.
Encourage your children to try new things. We live in a world of perfection. Fake as that is, it often keeps people from trying new things. Listen to what your child is interested in, encourage them to step outside their comfort zone! Do not limit their interest to just sports if they prefer chess club or FFA. Every child is unique and no one is perfect at anything when they first begin. Cheer them on as they participate in something new, encourage their progress and if they fail and it is not for them, show them failure is part of life. The best part is tomorrow is a new day and with a loving parent behind them, they will be ready to try something new again until they find their groove.
Share your own struggle. This will need to be tailored for age appropriateness, but children often see their parents as incredible! My five year old while driving the other day asked me “Mom why are you so awesome?” I tell him all the time he is awesome - proof that they listen to us!! While I of course refrained from telling him how awesome I truly am — laughter please — I did melt inside with complete heart eyes and giggle at the love of a child. I know I fail daily, but in his eyes I am a constant in his life and that counts for something! By the way, kudos mamas (and dads) because you are amazing! Parenting is the hardest “job” I’ve ever had. Do not be afraid to share a story of how you failed. Maybe you were not great at soccer the first year, or piano was hard for you until you’d been in lessons for awhile, but encourage them to keep trying. As children grow, the lessons should become more advanced, because lets be real — if failing at a sport was your worst struggle, then life would be a breeze!
Recognize effort. We live in a world of instant gratification and it is easy to reward our kids for everything, and I mean EVERYTHING! Raise your hand if you are guilty of this?!? I know I am. Not everything in life needs or deserves a reward, sometimes it is just normal expectations of behavior, or work that should be put into an activity. Celebrate them wisely.
“Thank you for being a part of my journey! I continue to share real life, laugh and enjoy my blog because of you!”
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